Hey All

This is my first attempt at blogging so bear with me. I"m sure it will be a lovely confusing journey thru the chaos that I like to call my life...but at least it won't be boring!!

Thought I had my "midlife" crisis at 30, but now with 40 coming up quick...oi vey!! Shouldn't my life be settled by now, family, career, know what I wanna be when I grow up..? You know, all the basics. Well, it ain't so and I think I"m more confused about life than ever, well, somedays. Other days I feel like I've got my act together and I'm on the move in the right direction. Who knows but God. It would be nice if He'd drop a hint once in a while just to let me know I'm going in the right direction. Of course, maybe He is doing that and I"m just to blind to see it.

Work takes up most of my time, which is good because I hate being bored. Then I have school part time and the pups..well, they aren't really pups anymore. Riley is getting old, really old. He'll be 15 in a couple months..somedays he gets around really good and other days he kinda just stares right thru you, like he doesn't even know you are there. He's a good boy and has been for long time...now, if I could just get him to remember that he was housebroken once upon a time...life would be good. Shadow, well, Shadow is a mystery all her own. Thrown from a vehicle at an early age, she was terrified of most everybody, except me. 5 years ago you better not be male and try to walk in my house, you'd think she was gonna eat you alive. Been working a long time with her, abuse does funny things to the mind, whether you are an animal or a human. She's my "big" dog, weighing in at 127lbs so she can be rather intimidating if she's not happy. Its amazing how helping a helpless animal heal can help you heal your own battered and torn heart. She doesn't meet everybody at the door with a growl anymore, usually she backs up and hides behind me..wagging her tail. We've actually seen great improvement just in the last couple of months...she's actually let several visitors touch her and pet her and she's gone back and begged them to do it again. So there is hope for the hopeless in this life. Even though she is a huge animal, she thinks she is a chihuahua and always wants to curl up in my lap. It amazes me how animals are so forgiving..after everything she's been thru, she's still willing to give people a chance and openly love them. I wonder if the human heart is ever so resilient. My third pup is a mystery to me. Bear is a cockapoo/sheepdog mix or something of that nature..not quite sure who daddy was. She's almost 3 but still all puppy. She reminds me of a cutting horse the way she zooms around the back yard and stops on a dime and switches direction. I've had her since she was 6 weeks old and she's never been mistreated that I"m aware of. She is the jumpiest animal I've ever know, you move to quick and she jumps right out of her skin. She's my barker, drives me nuts...doesn't help make friends with the neighbors either. Oh, well, she's getting better..still got aways to go.

Oh, what do you do with a father that needs to get his own life and is driving you nuts!!!! any suggestions.....??