Update at the ranch

Hey ya'll, sorry I've been a little incognito lately...its been a little nuts around here. Riley is still amazingly doing wonderful, thanks for all the prayers for the little stinker, typical boy....just likes to give his mama a scare. Sorry I've missed Life group and Sunday nights. Things have just been a little hectic. Dogs, dad, time at the real ranch, work, refinancing the house, making arrangements to get the truck fixed and trying to get stuff together to fix the roof...just haven't been able to squeeze it all in. Things should hopefully calm down in the next week or so and life can get back to "normal" (whatever that really means).

This might sound a little weird, but things are going really and truly incredibly good right now and that just scares the tar out of me. I'm so used to the bad that when its good I'm always waiting for the rug to be pulled out from under me. Trying really hard right now to just trust God. Trust is really a 5 letter word for me, didn't learn how to do it growing up so its really hard now. Doing my best to just accept the fact that God is in control and I just have to do my best to live in Him but every once in a while, the fear rears its ugly head. Is God playing with me, getting my hopes up or setting me up to fall really hard? I know that isn't truth but my head doesn't always see the truth. Ok, this necessity to be so transparent is really freaking me out. Bear with me, I'm still trying to find myself....have you seen me lately?? LOL!!!!

My boys are coming for a visit this week, Chiefers and Jericho get to come spend Thanksgiving with Aunt Robbi and cousins Riley, Shadow and Bear. Woohoo....fur will be flying everywhere. Thats an ok thing here at the ranch by the way...it all sweeps up eventually! Now, the only issue is going to be, where is Aunt Robbi gonna sleep...have you ever tried to share a bed with 5 dogs, especially when 2 of them are already over 100 lbs each and the other 3 combined make another 100 lbs. maybe I'll just grab a blanket and hit the floor!!

Oh, news flash...I"m thinking about going back to school again. I know I know, I just got done, but I'm really thinking about going for the Associates in the Veterinary Technician program. Another 2 years, but this time I'd actually have a degree instead of just a certificate. Thoughts, opinions, suggestions.............

God is Good

well, amazingly my little dog must be part cat because it appears that he has 9 lives. Riley woke up this morning and bounced out of the bed on his own, trotted outside, did his morning ritual and bounced, yes, bounced, skipped, jumped, whatever you want to call it, up the back stairs and into the kitchen where he proceeded to eat half of my breakfast. he's back to his perky 15 year old self and I only have God to thank. I went to bed last night pretty sure that I would have to put my boy down today and God heard my cry and restored my little old man. Thank You Jesus!!

Sadness at the Ranch

This past two weeks have been somewhat bittersweet. Got a new truck, finished school, hit deer with new truck, house appraisal in hopes that refinance goes thru and now, today, a great sadness has descended upon the ranch. My BFF in the whole wide world seems to be on his last legs or paws. Riley, dear sweet lovable Riley, turned 15 years old on 11/8. This morning we went thru our usual routine, alarm goes off and 3 pups head for the back door for their morning potty break. They usually stay out while I shower, breakfast and get everything ready to head for work. I went to let them back in this morning, Riley was sitting on my tractor, as usual. The last couple months he has had problems getting off the tractor, I think because his vision is failing. This morning was no surprise, he was up and couldn't get down. I picked him up and set him down on the ground and he proceeded to collapse in front of me. He had no control of his rear extremities and couldn't stand up. I picked him up and carried him inside. He was shaking so hard, like he just couldn't get warm. I put him in bed and covered him with 2 blankets and he was still shaking. He always follows me to the front door when I leave but this morning, he didn't even lift his head when I said goodbye. I just wanted to cry and I wanted to stay home, but I had to go to work.

When I got home this evening, Riley was still in the bed. He had moved, he had himself propped up against the window. He drug himself to the edge of the bed and tried to hop down but couldn't. I picked him up and put him back in the center of the bed and covered him back up with his blanket and layed down with him. As the evening went on, he became a little more mobile and actually ate his dinner. I"d like to get my hopes up, but not sure its a good idea. He still drags his rear legs and he can't hold his balance. He's still shaking like he can't get warm.

I'm in a position now where I have to decide the fate of my best friend. How do I make the decision of whether my best friend gets to continue living or if he should die? I've had to make this decision before and you would think it would get easier each time you have to do it, but it doesn't. Each one of these special friends that God gives us is so uniquely different, personality, little quirks, vocalizations, the way they snuggle or play. How do I give up my best friend of 15 years? How do I go on without him? Do I wait it out and see if he gets better or do I just end it now and hope its the right decision? I can't stand to see him suffer and I won't let him. Thankfully he doesn't appear to be in any pain. All he wants to do is be near me and comfort me. Why are our dogs granted so few years to share our lives? Why can't he be with me for another 15 years?

After watching him all evening, I'm beginning to think that he may have had a stroke and that is what is causing the paralysis that comes and goes. I don't know how to say goodbye to this one, he is like so many of my other dogs but yet he is so totally different. He has compassion and intellect and a sense of humor....man he really loves to play jokes and horse around...when I was part of the clown troop at Stones, Riles was right there with me in his little tuxedo and top hat, loving every minute of it. He's never met a stranger and if he didn't like somebody, by golly, I knew to stay away from them because he generally loved everybody he met.

I don't know whats gonna happen tomorrow, maybe God will choose to heal whatever this affliction is or perhaps He will just let him slip into slumber and chase those dadburn rabbits he was never able to catch or a decision may have to be made depending on his condition when we wake up. Whatever happens, please be praying for Riley and me...because right now I don't know what I"m going to do without him.

I DID IT!!!!!!!!

I DID IT!!!! Can you believe it, I'm done. I am now officially a Certified Veterinary Assistant. In 2-3 weeks I"ll have my official certificate. Woohoo!!!!!!! Party, Celebrate!!! I"m done, I'm done.....can you tell I'm a little excited?? I can't believe it. Two years of work and its finally done. Where'd the time go? Don't know? What am I gonna do now? Don't know. Waiting on God now to tell me what to do and where...so for now I"m still selling football helmets, but who knows what the future has in store? Only God!!! I actually finally finished something. Yay me!!! sorry if that sounds a little conceited, not meant in that tone..its just I"m great out of the gate but sometimes a little lacking in stamina and I"m just so excited that I finally did it. YAY GOD, YAY ME!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!

On a side note, talking to the bank on Friday about refinancing the house so any and all prayer would be most kindly appreciated!!!!

Goodbye Blue

Greetings and welcome to the edge of controlled chaos (well, it sounded good in my head). anyhoo, countdown continues, 3 more tests and I am an official Certified Veterinarian Assistant, ooohh, now besides having CSR after my name, I can add CVA. But do having a bunch of initials after your name really make you important, na. Looks good though.

Said goodbye to a dear old friend this week. Put Blue out to pasture (for those of you wondering who the heck is Blue...she was my beloved little truck that always wanted to grow into a big truck someday). Well, Blue got old and tired and well, what do you do with the "old folks" in your life...put em in a home, junk em out, sell em or as we say here at the ranch...."trade em"!!! Thats right folks, you ain't gonna see me and ole Blue on the road anymore. Welcome the Titan to the ranch!! Me and the pups are now the proud owners of a 2007 Ford F150 Super Cab!! Giddyup!! Thanks to Mr Mic for finding her for me!!! I feel like a grown up now, I got a mortgage and a truck payment. Woohoo!! Blue finally grew up into a real truck and dyed her hair, lol!!!!